Good morning, everyone and please be seated. It is lovely to see you all this morning and a very Happy New Year to you all. It only feels like yesterday we were celebrating the end of term by singing the 12 days of Christmas and looking forward to the holiday.
I hope the holiday was a chance for you to slow down and enjoy your free time. Some of you may have travelled and discovered new places; others might have cherished a quieter time at home. Wherever you were, I hope it brought you time to recharge your batteries and strengthen connections with your nearest and dearest.
For some of you however, your holidays did involve the school; a ski trip to Switzerland took place in the first week of the holiday which I heard went very well. Thank you to Mr Burbidge, Mrs Kwiecinska, Mr Mustaq and Mr Goddard for staffing and organising the trip.
You might also notice we’re a little smaller in number this morning. That’s because Year 10 and Year 12 are sitting their Progress Exams this week – in their absence we wish them all well. Many of them have balanced revision with relaxation over the holidays, and I’m confident their work will be reflected in their results. If you see them this week, offer them a friendly word of encouragement.
So here we are in 2026, and I was thinking to myself that doesn’t time fly. Perhaps a little less fast the younger you are, unless you are in the exam years in which case the next set of exams are just round the corner.
But I remember the first iPhone being shown to the world in January 2007 before some of you were even born! Covid was first detected in the UK in January 2020 and in 2022 we were experiencing 16 degrees in a mini-January heatwave which a far cry from this morning’s minus 6 degrees.
Though January can be seen as a bit of a dreary month, we have a lot to look forward to this year with the Winter Olympics starting in February, the football World Cup in the summer and for those celebrity watchers amongst you, a rumoured Taylor Swift wedding.
We also have our own headline event coming up and that is a school inspection, but that won’t be until the end of term so we can look forward to that later on in the term.
But before all that, I want to talk to you this morning about our focus this term about belonging - how it is lived, how it is felt. It is not an easy thing to get our heads arounds, especially on a cold Monday morning first thing, but I want it to be a focus of this term, and I want to reflect on this theme through my own experiences in the holiday.
My holiday was full of seeing family, friends and motorway driving, which is becoming quite usual during the Christmas holidays as we travel the country to see family. Five hours plus up to the Lakes to see my in-laws, then a couple of hours to Suffolk to visit my mum and family.
This year, the car became a moving soundtrack thanks to my seven-year-old daughter who has fallen in love with K-pop Demon Hunters and wants it played on repeat, my five-year-old, who was determined to sing his own version of Jingle Bells with rude lyrics and a relentless game of questions from my 9 year old designed to make me say “six, seven!” - you can imagine the volume and the laughter. It has been noisy, tiring, but genuinely joyful. That’s the magic of having a young family and the magic of this time of year.
But Christmas holidays aren’t always completely relaxing from the perspective of an adult in the (early) middle years of their life. There are people you want to see, and people you ought to see. There are relationships that need attention and kindness. There are old patterns and family roles that you slip back into when visiting childhood homes or old friends. Sometimes there are tricky conversations, but more often there’s a lot of laughter. Sometimes you find yourself in the middle of the Lakes trying to find a coffee on a dark afternoon at 2pm realising that they don’t take Apple Pay and you have a splitting headache from either the cold wet weather or the lack of caffeine – just sometimes!
Either way, the willingness to show up for your people, even when it’s busy, imperfect, and not entirely restful is what creates the Christmas feel. It is what strengthens relationships with your nearest and dearest even if that is just being civil with those you know and you have to see each year.
When we arrived at my mum’s house over the holidays, along with my brothers, sisters and their children, it felt like stepping back into the past. I’m one of six children, and when we all gather, we fall back into our old routines and pecking orders when we were growing up. I’m the second youngest so my older sisters still tell me what to do and my younger brother gets away with anything! However, the food, the familiar games, the stories, the repeated rituals, these are the threads that tie us together. Being there took me back to a time that felt more carefree, when holidays seemed endless, and there were less worries in our lives.
Those moments reminded me of the deeper thing I want us to focus on today: belonging. Belonging to my family is a large part of who I am. But belonging isn’t just about family. It’s something we all seek in different places: in a sports team, in a friendship group, through activities, even as a nation, and in particular a school.
When I was at school at your age, all I wanted to do was fit in; I wanted to remain fairly anonymous in the large rough state secondary school I attended and when I did fit in, I felt a sense of belonging, but here’s the key distinction: belonging is not the same as fitting - in actual fact fitting in is the opposite of belonging.
• Fitting-in asks you to change yourself to be accepted.
• True belonging asks you to be yourself and still be valued.
This distinction is central to the research of Brené Brown, an American research professor who says:
“True belonging doesn’t require you to change who you are; it requires you to be who you are.”
When I am with my family I feel a proper sense of belonging. When I am at my sports clubs I feel a sense of belonging, when I am with close friends I feel a sense of belonging, when I am at work I feel a sense of belonging. These places are where I am free to be me. I wonder which places in your world are where you feel belonging?
A warning note here: Belonging can be misused. Brown warns about a counterfeit form she calls “common enemy intimacy” - that sense of unity built not on shared care, but on shared hostility. It feels powerful. It can even look like community from the outside. But it doesn’t nurture the best in us, and it doesn’t last. Examples are:
• Gossip about a disliked pupil or member of staff.
• Bonding with someone over a mutual disdain for a group.
• Creating an "us vs. them" mentality with friends against another person or group.
It is all too easy to fall into a state of exclusion, negativity, and holding others in a negative light, rather than courageous, authentic belonging that grows empathy and connection.
Coming back to my family for a minute. My children’s sense of belonging comes from them being able to be themselves - the car songs, the jokes, the quirks, we accept them as individuals. They don’t all like the same music. They don’t find the same games fun. They don’t have the same interests. They are not the same person - and there is strength in that difference.
I often say about my children: they are the same, but they are different. The sameness is the bond - their commitment to one another. The difference is the gift - the personalities, interests, and quirks that make each child who they are. Belonging is big enough to hold both. That’s a helpful picture of what we’re aiming for here at school.
A school with a healthy sense of belonging is a place where:
• You bring your authentic self to school
• Difference is welcomed and celebrated
• And as I say in my Open Day speech, a good school looks to make pupils first-rate version of ourselves, not second-rate versions of other people.
This is the heart of our commitment to DEI - Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion. DEI isn’t a slogan; it’s the daily work of making school a place where everyone can bring their authentic self to learn and flourish - and that authenticity powers us as an institution.
Belonging isn’t something we just declare in assemblies and our website, it is something we co-create, we need to work on it if it is to be real. That’s why we’re keen to understand how you feel. Our Pupil Voice initiative is here to listen: to listen to your thoughts about the school, to what helps you feel that you belong, to what gets in the way, and to what we can improve. This can happen through our Student Council, individual conversations, clubs and societies all of which help to shape decisions.
But we also know that not everyone feels represented by that system - and not everyone wants to speak in a big room, to an adult or to a group of pupils in a club. So, this term we’re starting the Voices for Change Group, a group designed to bring forward quieter voices: the pupils who don’t often put their hands up, or who feel outside the usual channels of communication. We want to hear from you and that will be led by Mrs Ochana.
As we start this new year, I want you to carry three thoughts with you:
1. Belonging isn’t fitting-in. It’s being your true self and being truly accepted.
2. Your voice matters. Use Pupil Voice and Voices for Change. If you don’t usually speak, consider this your invitation.
3. Our community of kindness value strives to foster a sense of belonging; and at the very least, it calls for civility and respect in every interaction
So finally, one request from me: look for one person this week whom you can help feel they belong - without asking them to fit-in. A welcome, an invitation, a listen, a “How are you - really?” It’s a small act with outsized impact.
Let’s build belonging, courage, and kindness this term and work together to make it strong.
Thank you everyone and have a good start to term.
Mr King
